Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Things To Stop Doing To Yourself………
– Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true friends.
– Face them head on. It won’t be easy. No one in the world is able to handling every punch thrown at them. We aren’t supposed to be able to instantly solve problems. That’s not how we’re made. We’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. That’s the purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and solve them over the course of time. This is what makes us the person we become.
– You can lie to anyone else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself. Our lives improve only when we are honest with ourselves.
– The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. Help others; but help yourself too. Follow your passions and do something for you now.
– Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love the real you.
– You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
– Doing something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive than doing nothing. You end up regretting the things you did NOT do far more than the things you did.
– We all make mistakes, have struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the power to shape your day and your future. It’s our mistakes that teach us, make us stronger, and help us know what we do and don’t want from life. Every single thing that has ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to come.
– Many of the things we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our passions.
– If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be able to find happiness because of someone else.
– Don’t think too much or you’ll create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. Evaluate situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse to confront.
– Nobody ever feels 100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first.
– Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to be in bad company. There’s no need to rush. If something is meant to be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re lonely.
– In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you. But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you.
– Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you. Success is a battle between YOU and YOURSELF only.
– Jealousy is the art of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself this: “What’s something I have that everyone wants?”
– Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You’ll often see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be.
– Don’t live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace, liberate yourself! And remember, forgiveness is not just for other people, it’s for you too. If you must, forgive yourself, move on and try to do better next time.
– Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
– Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.
– The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it. If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly.
– Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to you.
– The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done.
– Life is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something . Don’t take the easy way out. Do something worthwhile.
– It’s okay to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that everything is going well. You shouldn’t be concerned with what other people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed your tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile again.
– Take responsibility for your life and your choices. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility and throw away your time.
– It’s impossible to do , and trying will burn you out. Remember that making one person smile CAN change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their world. So narrow your focus.
– Worry will not strip tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself if it will matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five years?” If not, then don’t worry about it.
– Focus on what you do want to happen. If you awake every morning with the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today, and you pay close attention, you’ll usually find you’re right.
– No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
(click on link for more info about Gloria)
21 Ways Gloria Steinem Taught Us To Be Better Women
Without Gloria Steinem's passionate zest for change and equality, women would not be where we are today.
To celebrate the feminist author, activist and all-around awe-inducing goddess on her 80th birthday, we've compiled some of her best quotes and lessons from over the years.
Here are 21 things Gloria has taught us:
Friday, March 21, 2014
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
I thought this article from Science Daily was very interesting and provides possible explanations for some of the differences in how men and women handle things.
Stress undermines empathic abilities in men but increases them in women
Date: March 17, 2014
Source: Sissa Medialab
Stressed males tend to become more self-centered and less able to distinguish their own emotions and intentions from those of other people. For women the exact opposite is true. Stress, this problem that haunts us every day, could be undermining not only our health but also our relationships with other people, especially for men. Stressed women, however, become more “prosocial” according to new research.
Stressed males tend to become more self-centered and less able to distinguish their own emotions and intentions from those of other people. For women the exact opposite is true. Stress, this problem that haunts us every day, could be undermining not only our health but also our relationships with other people, especially for men. Stressed women, however, become more “prosocial,” according to new research.
These are the main findings of a study carried out with the collaboration of Giorgia Silani, from the International School for Advanced Studies (SISSA) of Trieste. The study was coordinated by the Social Cognitive Neuroscience Unit of the University of Vienna and saw the participation of the University of Freiburg. This is the main finding of a study just published in Psychoneuroendocrinology, carried out with the collaboration of SISSA in Trieste.
"There's a subtle boundary between the ability to identify with others and take on their perspective -- and therefore be empathic -- and the inability to distinguish between self and other, thus acting egocentrically" explains Silani. "To be truly empathic and behave prosocially it's important to maintain the ability to distinguish between self and other, and stress appears to play an important role in this."
Stress is a psycho-biological mechanism that may have a positive function: it enables the individual to recruit additional resources when faced with a particularly demanding situation. The individual can cope with stress in one of two ways: by trying to reduce the internal load of "extra" resources being used, or, more simply, by seeking external support. "Our starting hypothesis was that stressed individuals tend to become more egocentric. Taking a self-centred perspective in fact reduces the emotional/cognitive load. We therefore expected that in the experimental conditions people would be less empathic" explains Claus Lamm, from the University of Vienna and one of the authors of the paper.
The surprise was that our starting hypothesis was indeed true, but only for males. In the experiments, conditions of moderate stress were created in the laboratory (for example, the subjects had to perform public speaking or mental arithmetic tasks, etc.). The participants then had to imitate certain movements (motor condition), or recognise their own or other people's emotions (emotional condition), or make a judgement taking on another person's perspective (cognitive condition). Half of the study sample were men, the other half were women.
"What we observed was that stress worsens the performance of men in all three types of tasks. The opposite is true for women" explains Silani.
Why this happens is not yet clear. "Explanations might be sought at several levels," concludes Silani. "At a psychosocial level, women may have internalized the experience that they receive more external support when they are able to interact better with others. This means that the more they need help -- and are thus stressed -- the more they apply social strategies. At a physiological level, the gender difference might be accounted for by the oxytocin system. Oxytocin is a hormone connected with social behaviours and a previous study found that in conditions of stress women had higher physiological levels of oxytocin than men."